Hold Me If You Can (Mancini Way 2) Read online

“Fuck, I can’t stop fucking you.” He thrust into my body so sweetly I stayed on that high. I felt his cock give one last jerk before he slowly pulled out of me. I thought for sure he would leave me this time, but instead he made his way down between my thighs.

  I watched him as he put his fingers inside of me, and his tongue on my swollen clit. “Ohhh Hank what…?” I pushed myself into his hand as my body twisted with pleasure. The man is a machine. He brought my body back to fever pitch before removing his fingers and replacing them with his tongue. My body hadn’t quite come down yet and soon I was building towards certain climax again.

  In a lust filled frenzy I smacked and pulled at him until he got the message and shifted his body, putting his cock where I could reach it with my mouth. I fell on it like a starved bear cub and what I lacked in technique I tried my best to make up for with zest.

  We pleasured each other with our mouths until I came, still sucking on his cock until it was back to its full hardness again, hitting the back of my throat and filling my mouth. Just as I was almost out of breath he pulled out of my mouth and I gasped for air and tried to get my bearings; but it was not to be.

  He threw me roughly onto my hands and knees, and before I had them firmly planted was driving into me again. It hurt so good I pushed back to get more of him as I fisted the sheets.

  “Yes Hank.” I no longer cared what I looked or sounded like, all that mattered was that he never stopped what he was doing.

  His hands came up to cover my breasts and squeezed and I felt the answering pull in my gut and down between my thighs. His lip was at my ear, whispering, tantalizing me with his words. “I’m going to miss this so much when I’m gone baby. I’ll hurry back to you. I promise.” He kissed his way down my throat and once again caught the flesh between his teeth.

  My body was sore beneath the immense pleasure as he moved in and out of me wildly. All the restraint he’d used before was long gone and in its place was this wild untamed beast. I closed my eyes and just felt. Our bodies slapped together furiously. All that could be heard was the harsh rasp of our breath and the sweet sound of his cock sliding in and out of my wetness.

  “One day soon I’m going to be fucking into you like this; just like this. My cock buried deep in your sweet pussy, your breasts in my hands. And just as I bite into your neck to leave my mark, I’m going to fuck my kid into you.”

  My insides twisted in a hard knot as the throbbing between my thighs intensified. I threw my head back against his shoulder and opened my mouth to scream, but just as the sound began to escape he covered my mouth with his and pounded out the last of his lust deep inside me.

  The heat of his words stayed with me and my body went into spasms that seemed to go on forever. He could’ve done anything to me in that moment, and I wouldn’t have cared, I was too far-gone. Was it possible to die from too much pleasure? If so, I’m afraid I was close.

  We stayed locked like that for a long time. Him, shaking off the last remnants of his seed inside me, and me twitching and clenching around him with my now, swollen walls. Swollen because he’d turned to me five times during the night and somehow I still wanted more.

  “I’ll call you soon babygirl.” He pulled out of my body and kissed between my legs before placing another soft kiss on my ass cheek. With one last mind-blowing kiss he rolled out of bed and pulled on his clothes.

  My eyes followed his every move, my heart still wrapped in the warm cocoon of lust and every other wild emotion he’d awakened in me. He came back and leaned over the bed to take my lips again as if he was finding it hard to leave. “Behave yourself while I’m gone.” He gave me one last long look, and with that he walked out the door without looking back.

  It felt like a part of me went with him. It wasn’t long before I was feeling empty and just a little afraid. There was so much left undone between us, so many things that we haven’t said to each other. Cold seeped in on the heels of that thought as I stared at the doorway he’d just left.

  When he climbed into my bed last night, I knew we were heading into murky waters, but his touch, the way he made me feel, had pushed every argument I had to the back of my mind. And to be honest I think I knew that we’d end up in bed together, just not so soon. I thought I had at least a little more control than his usual fare.

  But now after the wild passion was spent and I could still feel him, had his mark on me, the enormity of my situation hit home. I think I’m in trouble, and not just from my superiors. My stupid heart hurt because he was gone. I’d become one of those women I’d once scorned. Well maybe scorned is too harsh a word. But I certainly never thought I could be the type who’d pine for a man. And one that hadn’t been gone that damn long.

  There were two very pressing matters facing me now. My feelings for him, and what the hell I was going to say to my boss. Somehow I didn’t see him patting me on the head with a ‘job well done’. I’d really done it this time. First time in the field and I’d fallen for the target. So much for being the best and the brightest. But was it really my fault?

  Even before we came face to face I didn’t believe he was the man the Bureau had sent me after. Something about him as I read his file had jumped out at me even then. There was always something niggling at the back of my mind, something that just didn’t feel right. And since it was my job to see what others couldn’t, to trust my instincts, I’d not let myself get caught up in the obvious prejudice against him.

  I’d kept my feelings to myself, especially when other female agents had commented on his looks and his alleged dark persona with a hint of admiration for the man while overlooking his supposed crimes. I guess I was halfway infatuated with him since the beginning and had tried my damnedest not to let that cloud my judgment.

  The more time I spent with him in the last few days only confirmed my thoughts, that he was not what he seemed. And though I still had no explanation for why the billionaire playboy was so secretive in his dealings, I was at least reassured that I hadn’t become enticed by a criminal.

  There was something there in his heart, the heart he kept so well hidden from others, but somehow I’d been allowed to see. He wasn’t the evil villain they portrayed him to be, though it was easy to see why they would think it. The man is just too…too enigmatic.

  But this is something else entirely. I’d crossed a line that I never should’ve. As I laid there, my own words came back to me. I remembered all the things I’d said. Things I’d sworn would never happen between him and I because I had more sense. I wasn’t one of those simpering playthings that he was so often rumored to be romancing. No, I am worst.

  3

  Cierra

  Oh shit! What have I done? I rolled to my back and just laid there in a daze, staring up at the ceiling with the feel of him still in me and on me. I had to get my head on straight and come up with a plan. I knew the repercussions for what I’d done, knew that I could very well lose everything I’d worked so hard for. “Oh you idiot.” I covered my face with my hands as I berated myself.

  I replayed everything from the moment he first climbed into my bed in the dark, until a few minutes ago when he left. I went from hot to cold and back in seconds and that cocoon disappeared to be replaced by sickening fear. Without him here to keep the world out, it all came crashing down on me at once.

  Did this really happen? How could I have been so irresponsible? No matter how I looked at it I was in a no-win situation. Had anyone seen him come to me? I knew he was under constant watch but surely he’d taken precautions.

  Not one for burying my head in the sand, I spelt it out for myself in the barest terms. I slept with Hank Mancini. The man the Bureau had taxed me with finally bringing to task for crimes, which were as yet unfounded but highly suspect.

  The phone rang in the middle of my reverie and I picked it up without looking to see who it was. It was Hank and I couldn’t restrain the silly grin on my face even though less than a second ago I was fighting inner turmoil. Just hearing his voice was enough to calm my fears for a time. He didn’t stay long, but I felt like a schoolgirl with her first crush. It wasn’t long though before reality kicked in again.

  Panic set in as I climbed out of bed with my mind racing. I had no idea how I was supposed to handle this, was I supposed to out myself to my superiors? My stomach cramped at the thought of standing before those men discussing…my cheeks burned with shame and it was only a thought, I can’t imagine if it actually came to that.

  I moved back towards the nightstand to grab my phone to call Gracie, she’d know what to do, she always does. I stopped with my hand stretched out towards it. No, maybe I shouldn’t let anyone else in on my stupidity just yet. I have to think.

  I cleared my mind the way I’d taught myself to and let only my one goal in life remain. My mind slowly relaxed and I settled myself down enough to ease the panic away. If there is a way to salvage this I will figure it out. No matter what, I must not lose my job with the bureau; but can I survive losing him? I’m afraid I already knew the answer to that question.

  Even with uncertainty hanging over my head he still fought his way back to front and center in my mind. How could he not be? The man had a reputation that was obviously well founded. My body was still singing, and the memory of the words he’d whispered still made me blush.

  That was another thing. All those sweet words sounded good in the moment, but had he meant them? Or were they patented lines he fed to all the women he took to his bed? Somehow he didn’t strike me as the type to lie about such things, but what do I know? My life hadn’t left room for romance and I doubt even if it had it would’ve prepared me for this.

  If he weren’t who he is, if I didn’t have to hide what had happened between us, last night would’ve been the most amazing thing that had ever happened to me. In fact that’s a lie, it still is, which is why this is so hard. I feel like I am being torn in two. I had an obligation, a promise I needed to fulfill before I could think of myself, and any future happiness.

  But last night, for the first time since my family had been taken from me so horribly, I hadn’t felt that burning need for answers that has driven me since that fateful night. If I had to, could I give it up? Could I walk away from the one thing that had meant anything to me my whole adult life?

  I’d worked my way through the academy with that one thing being my singular focus, and in a matter of days he’d pushed his way in and taken me over. I wiped the tears from my eyes as I contemplated my life and the mess I’d made of it. There was no precedent that I knew of for what I’d done. No stories of agents falling in love with the subject and coming out unscathed.

  There didn’t seem to be any clear answer. There really was only one question that needed an answer in all honesty. Was I willing to risk it all for a chance with him, to feel what only he, had ever made me feel? Or was this just a phase that either he or I would wake up from soon?

  What if the night hadn’t meant as much to him as it did to me? What if it was all an act? Somehow I didn’t think so. There was no way with all my training that I could’ve been so easily duped. And his eyes, the way he looks at me. The way his hands trembled when he touched me. No, it was real of that I was sure. That little glimmer of hope gave my heart peace even as my mind was in turmoil.

  I can’t deny the feelings he’s awakened in me, or their impact, not if I were being true to myself. But did they have to come with fear? No matter how I looked at it there was going to be trouble ahead. My head started pounding wildly as my vision clouded.

  I curled into a ball and let the tears fall. Some part of me was going to die because of this. My fear was which one? I closed my eyes and sought escape if only for a little while.

  The tug of war went on forever inside until I admitted to myself that even now, I missed him already. Truth is, I was more focused on getting through the next few days without him here than I was on what was going to happen to my job. I should’ve paid more attention to the relationship thing. I had no idea that love or the beginnings of it could cause such angst.

  I rolled over with a loud sigh and wished I didn’t have to face the day, but I still had a job to do. ‘Shit, where did he say he was going?’ That was another worry, I’m supposed to be watching him and… I sat up in bed and looked around the room as if searching for answers.

  I’m well and truly fucked. The phone rang and I knew before I answered who was on the other end. “Stone headquarters, now.” He hung up and my stomach dropped to the floor. They knew. I should’ve known they’d be watching.

  I hurried through my shower and got dressed with my mind set to numb. Now that the truth seemed to be out and I was about to face my fate, the lines were no longer so blurred. How could I have been so stupid? How could I have thrown it all away, and for what? He’d left my bed and disappeared to who knows where. Did I just flush my life down the drain for one night of…?

  I felt sick to my stomach as I headed out to my car. My training hadn’t prepared me for this. The sick panic threatened to choke me as my body literally went into fight or fight mode. I felt like one of those stories you hear about people in near death situations. The one where their whole lives flashes before their eyes as they struggle to keep their heads above water.

  4

  Cierra

  As I drove through the unfamiliar streets of New York, I replayed the last few years of my life. I thought of everything I’d worked so hard to achieve. Foremost on my mind was the one thing that has been a driving force in my life since I was a young child, left orphaned after one night of unspeakable horror.

  It was this that had sustained me all these years. My need for justice has taken precedence over everything else until now. I thought of the push to succeed, the many sleepless nights spent planning and plotting even as a young girl.

  I’d set my course a long time ago and everything I’d done since then until a few short days ago when my eyes met his across a table, had been for one purpose and one purpose only. Now I am being torn in two. My past and my future seem to be colliding and I’m helpless to stop it.

  Once settled, I tried to prepare myself for the worst, but there was no way. Raw panic sat in my gut until it rose up in my throat and choked me. I had no use for the tears that gathered in my eyes so fought them back roughly. Don’t be weak Cierra. Whatever happens you’ll bounce back.

  I gave myself that little pep talk as I got to the local office and made my way inside on shaky legs. The secretary just waved me in making the kernel of dread grow bigger in the pit of my stomach. I broke out in a sweat by the time I opened the door to the inner office. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this alone before in my life. Not surprising it was his face I saw when I wished for someone to hold my hand.

  “Your boy has disappeared, do you have any idea where he went?” The head of the division threw that at me as soon as I walked in. It took me a moment to realize that he wasn’t chewing me out for letting Mancini into my bed. I schooled my face so as not to give anything away while studying him to make sure he wasn’t playing me.

  “Uh, no sir.” He huffed for a minute as he swiveled around in his chair, a look of disappointment on his face before he turned to look at me once more. “We have to do something, we can’t have him disappearing at will, not now that we’re so close.” He stopped and looked at me in a way that was not altogether comfortable and I braced myself.

  It was his next words that made me breathe a sigh of relief for the time being. “He seems to like you, I want you to use that. We need an in with this guy and so far you seem to be our best bet.” He sat in contemplation after that cryptic statement and all I could think was ‘if only you knew’.

  “Everyone else has failed so far. This is the closest we’ve gotten in ten years. Don’t fuck this up.” He gave me a look as if to say that it was solely on me now, which made my stomach, churn. Until this very moment, I don’t think I’d truly appreciated how much was riding on this investigation, how much they were expecting of me.

  To the bureau, Hank Mancini wasn’t just another ‘Most Wanted’ poster. He was the real deal. Someone the higher-ups in the agency genuinely feared. Someone who has thwarted them for too many years, and who unlike most of the men and women on that list, wasn’t a fugitive, but a man who went about his dealings right under their noses seemingly without a care.

  At least for now it didn’t seem as if he knew what a fuck up I was, so that sickening fear and panic eased just a little bit more as I listened to him, while trying to plan my next move. Each word from his mouth just made me feel smaller as he heaped praise on my head for what a great job I’d been doing so far.

  I should just get this over with now. A little voice goaded. They may not yet know that I’d slept with the enemy, but how long before it all came tumbling down around me? I knew there was no hope of me getting out of what I’d started unscathed. Somehow, I didn’t see Mancini keeping a low profile, that is, if he hadn’t already walked away from his latest conquest. Would he go for keeping our relationship a secret for now if indeed we did have one? I don’t think so, and how could I even think to ask him?

  “If only there was a way to get ears and eyes in his place.” He looked at me expectantly and I squirmed. “He has an injunction…” He waved his hand around dismissively at my words. “I know-I know, but we’ve been getting around those things since the beginning.” Now he turned his whole body towards me and clasped his hands over his desk.

  I didn’t like the way he studied me, like a bug under a scope. I got even more restless when that stare lasted a little longer than was comfortable. “Do whatever it takes to get close to him. Do not let this fucker slip through your fingers. Your superiors have spoken very highly of you and we have a lot riding on this operation. This fucker have been beating us at every turn, you’re our golden star, the one who we believe can bring him down.”

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